Day is dimming

The day is dimming and I'm yearning for You

I won't be satisfied till I see Your face

Every victory, every loss,

every ticket every cross

You can put them all in place

It seems I'm finding more of why in these moments

I feel like I'm made to sing of how good You are

The more the years swell by and pass

each seconds more than last

it's true by far

that no profound thought or clever rhyme

no soaring, grand melodic line

no theory, philosophy or sign

can explain it

can explain

Where You are, I wanna be

It's Your love that has changed me

I'd give the world and all its charms

for a moment in Your arms

better is one day with You

than a thousand elsewhere

than a thousand elsewhere

I still remember what it felt like before You

I'm grateful everyday for how things have changed

I'll thank You everywhere i can

'cos my life only began 

when I heard You call my name

now no praise of man, no great acclaim

no humble looking kind of fane

no power, wealth or worldly gain

could satisfy me,

could ever satisfy

cos where You are I wanna be

It's Your grace that has raised me

I'd give my whole life

to honour You

and whom I live

and whom I move

better is one day with You

than a thousand elsewhere

Better is one day in Your courts

better is one day in Your house

better is one day in Your courts

than anywhere else

Lead me, lead me

lead me to Yourself

lead me to Your heart

where You are I wanna be

It's Your love that has changed me

I'd give my life to honour You

and whom I live

and whom I move

better is one day with You

than a thousand elsewhere

Lead me to Yourself

Lead me to Your heart

I'll be found in You

I'll be found in You

here is peace

here is joy

here is life

here is, freedom, freedom

in You

I'm quite grateful that I forgot that i saved a draft of the very same lyrics.

quite a few times I had to pause while typing this out. 

I knew i had to seize that moment while it lasted.

that moment when the lyrics took on a form bigger and deeper, a lot more animated and alive than the words on my monitor. 

where the lyrics seemed to be God's way of speaking to me, despite them being a melancholic paean to Himself.

and so I grabbed it.

it felt like I was clutching at empty straws. because, to be completely dead honest, I did deliberately decide to pause halfway while typing the lyrics so I could honestly say I did so. to perhaps, appear more sentimental than I felt(I heard this song last wed and only slept after midnight).

but I dunno how, once again, this song impacted me like a sledgehammer.(i've never felt it before actually, so perhaps the closest thing it comes to is Tim's(cos he was the first) and everyone else's hands smashing my face into a birthday cake. well, you can't blame me, my birthday was quite recent so I want to bring this up although i doubt it will make any of the guilty parties feel as though they are supposed to-GUILTY!)

the best part is, I can't seem to give this song a permanent form.

it seems to have taken on a few forms and spoke different volumes of similar impact each time. (the irony is that it seems i could be describing an extremely satanic song but it's time to get back to the topic.)

I can't explain it, I can't box it up. I wish I could capture its impacting essence in my mp3 or my macbook(MACBOOK FOR THE WIN!), but i can't. I can't.

why something so beautiful has to be so fleeting, is something that at times frustrates me, but other times makes me sit back and realise the frailty and infidelity of my heart.

So i hope that, as you listen to this song, you're as impacted as I was.

that you find yourself wanting to repeat this song even before halfway through the first verse

that you realise God is in all the beautiful things, but more importantly, that all the beautiful things are in God

that you see how things could and should be between you and your Maker  

that you realise once again that tears can burn, and then they leave a gelid residue

and then when you take an occasional glance at the clock, you realise it's the next day, but you decide it's worth staying up to contemplate something unknown, because you have forever and a day

and then you realize that all your contemplation brings no answer, but you've been glad to receive an apparent nothing, because you finally feel, deep within your bones, that all this while you've never been alone.